Note to self: when you have to get up at 7am the next day yet still don't feel sleepy by midnight, staying up later, drinking beer, and watching Conan is not as good of an idea as say, going to bed and just trying to sleep.

But there's no way in hell I could have turned off Conan last night. It was like porn, only BETTER: three intelligent, hilarious, men (Conan, Colbert, and Stewart) in lovely dark suits, pretending to beat the crap out of each other. If you missed it last night, I totally just made your day:

Don't you think filming that must have been the most fun EVER? It makes me wish that I had a television show so I could create ridiculous, over-the-top fight scenes like that. Wait, what am I talking about? Who needs a television show (and censors - no thanks!)? I have Vimeo and You Tube, as well as a video camera, and friends that really like to drink. This shit is ON.

Note to others: Fat Tuesday and Super Tuesday, though occurring on the same day this year, are not in fact that same thing. One is for getting shitfaced, flashing your tits, and public urination, and the other is for controlling this country's destiny.

I plan to celebrate both events by (go ahead, take a guess) voting, and (hopefully; I have plans with the boyfriend, we'll see) getting shitfaced. And yeah, maybe (hopefully; I have plans with the boyfriend, we'll see) some flashing.

I can say with some certainty that there will, however, be no public urination. But then I never thought I'd throw up in the boyfriend's bed, either, so we'll see!

(Actually, no, I can go ahead and say for sure that public urination absolutely will not happen. I have some lines, few and blurred as they may be, and I'm sorry but THAT IS ONE OF THEM. Hell, I still run the water in the bathroom at his place when I use the restroom.)

(Yes, really.)